Does Destiny Stand A Chance?

The wonderment of destiny and chance. How can one override the other? Who is the authority? Who has the final say? Destiny you make everything purposeful and sure, but with you is bitterness. Why is it your way or none at all? Destiny you offer security yes, but you are also a dictator. Is there no consideration for any other choice? And Chance, with you is possibilities but fear is your companion. Chance is a gambling man with no sense of obligation to any one person. You play with other people's lives and are separated from the outcome.  Is it all a game for you and we are your pawns? There are truly pros and cons with you both. Can I even know what is best for me? In a moment of choice I feel so confident and sure only for that confidence to be turned into regret and doubt. I am a frail being. My sight can be blurred and limited.  I am in deed in need of a savior. How my mind races from one choice to the other like it is playing musical chairs. When will the music stop? Where will I be when it does?

Puzzle Piece

There is nothing like the voice of strangers to make me feel so alone. Strangers, not from the stand point that you are unknown to each other, but in the fact that you travel on two different paths. Maybe parallel but separate. The voice of people that hear but do not understand. Your desires are like the wind that blows to them. You could utterly break down what it feels like to yearn for a heart that beats to the same rhythm as yours and oh the harmony of knowing you are not alone in the world. That there is a soul that exists outside of yourself that understands. The comfort of that. The utter peace that washes over. My puzzle piece. Are you buried somewhere in the world underneath pretentiousness and background noise? Do you amuse yourself with the beggarly elements of this world In hopes you might drown out the deep calling out to deep. Does the sound of my soul call out to yours? Do you know I'm out here? I exist. Am I being washed away like childhood fables? Will you know me when you see me? Feel me when I speak? My puzzle piece. 

A Cry In The Wilderness

A child cries out in the darkness for her Father. Her eyes open but surrounded by the cold emptiness of a place where  no light lives. Tears creeping down her cheeks she searches for His familiar voice. Where is he? She wonders. Her searching turns to anger and resentment. Her questions change. She no longer just wants his presence. She wants to know Why. Why is He allowing this fear and uncertainty to consume her. Why does every person around her seem so unconcerned, or mystified by her state. They speak with no wisdom. They move with no strength. Why? She is tight lipped now and doesn't want to talk to her Father. Afterall, why hasn't he talked to her first. Surely He knows where she is and the state she is in. Where does His voice dwell? Where did she lose it? Just then, "the voice of him that crieth in the wilderness, prepare ye the way of the Lord, make straight in the dessert a highway for our God." (Is. 40:3) So he wants her to make a way in the dessert?! Her frustration grows because she is already consumed with the lack of motivation to even speak life. Yet, she can not forsake all that she knows. The seed of His voice, His house, His love is embedded too deep. She kicks against the goads. She wrestles. She sees but is blind. She knows but is confused. In this wilderness her heart pants. The deep thirst stands at attention. Where is the fountain of His salvation? The Rivers of deliverance. "He turneth the wilderness into a standing water, and a dry ground into watersprings."(Ps. 107:35) Life teaches what words could not. So that the soul that stands in darkness can see truly. No longer standing under clouds with no water. No longer drinking of the streams of bitterness. In this dark place a voice can be heard crying in the wilderness. Precious Child, listen. 

Folly

A heart that would rather believe a lie than be freed by the truth. What is that? Why does man chase folly and pain? Trudging through life as a self fulfilling prophesy. Accepting what is not so to be what we are not. Treacherous heart. Why do you frolic in death? Why do you crave the grave? There are those you assign hate that love with a pain so wrenching. Yet you do not see. Neither do you want to see. You want to be tormented by the lies that come from your own hand. Watering these black seeds until you are bitter worm wood. You love death more than life. 

Love Me

My ears shut at the voice of strangers. Their words are empty and vain. There is is no comfort in them. They are dry river beds where no life is. But you my God have the words of life. Breathe into me and I will live. Give strength unto the feeble and make me not ashamed for trusting in your name. Your words turned my heart and brought me to this place. My heart searches for you in this dark and lonely world. Only you can save and deliver me from this death. Have mercy on me and blot out my transgressions. I desperately need your salvation. Deliver me. Have mercy on me. Love me. 

Assumptions

The mind can be tricky place. A look from someone can be taken down the path of your mind and end you in a place of rejection and anger. Sometimes we expect for someone to stop and say something or at least acknowledge our existence and when that doesn't happen we tread on the hot coals of resentment. All assumptions aside what if: what if they didn't see you...what if they were scared of being rejected...what if they believed you wanted space. ..what if there was no malice involved. What if God afforded you another opportunity. What if God granted them one as well. What if they looked and smiled. What if they stopped and hugged you. Yeah...all is forgiven...all is washed away because love can also cover a multitude of assumptions.